This is an exact transcription of a recent conversation. I have written it into a short play, as the format best illustrates that some people are geniuses in areas where others are... not.
Two people, male and female, enter stage left.
The female, "Winnie," appears slightly harried. Her clothing is casual and stained with dirt, mulch and bits of plaster. Two hammers, a cell phone and a large roll of plans hang from her belt; there are bits of leaf in her hair.
The male, "Chad," appears nondescript, except for horn-rimmed glasses. His demeanor betrays the fact that he may be a bit muddled.
Winnie: Chad, we need tuckpointing.
Chad: (Reaches behind and feels his waistband) Huh? Oh, thanks. Is my shirt hanging out again?!
Winnie: No, Chad. The building. The new one?
Chad: (nodding vacantly)
Winnie: It needs tuckpointing.
Chad: (bobble head motions continue, then gradually fade. Checks his phone for texts, eventually refocuses his attention back to Winnie, who continues to look straight at him.)
Winnie: (looking matronly, hands on hips) You know the auditorium is fully paid and nearly done, right?
Chad: (nodding once again)
Winnie: And you know we completed the roof? And you know the design and planning are fully paid?
Chad: Yup.
Winnie: The next step is tuckpointing.
Chad: (head goes still, blank stare.)
Winnie: t-u-c-k-p-o-i-n-t-i-n-g. Tuckpointing. Repairing the exterior. Making it look purty. Keeping the bricks where they belong - on the building and not in our yard.
Chad: Oh! Like the three little pigs!
Winnie: (blinks rapidly)
Chad: Right. Can't let the wolf in. Gotta keep the bricks where they belong. So... you need me to do more fundraising?
Winnie: Yeah. Like right now. We have the bid and can start immediately. Then the exterior will look brand-new and we can do the windows. Then, can you imagine?! (enthusiasm building, words coming faster) After the windows, the exterior and the auditorium are fully done, it will look incredible. All the neighbors can come and check it out and everyone will really be able to see what it's going to look like when it's done and we can hold events in the hall and it'll be.... really cool!!!
Chad: Wow Winnie, that is really cool. I'm sure glad you're around and handling all these contractors and stuff. We've made a lot of progress since you started doing this. I like fundraising a lot better now that I don't have to worry about the building as much!
(Chad and Winnie high-five, lights dim, curtain falls.)
Building project website: www.2345lafayette.org
As things happen, I'll post them. I give no guarantee regarding the entertainment value of this blog.
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